It’s Summer. It’s Time to Get Naked! Ten answers to your naked questions.

Photo from http://hcb4.tumblr.com/
Photo from http://hcb4.tumblr.com/

It’s summer! The sun is shining and the temperatures are finally heating up. For most of us, our thoughts turn to weekend cookouts, baseball games, swimming pools and fire pits.

It’s also a great time to go outside and get naked. Most nudist camps, clubs and resorts allow guests to try their facilities from Memorial Day to Labor Day. While it may sound a little intimidating at first, a nudist camp is a great way to learn more about nude recreation and can be a great experience for you and your spouse.

My wife and I are not nudist. We don’t sit around the house naked or garden in the buff. It doesn’t fit with our lifestyle, however when we can get some time away from our family, jobs, and other commitments, we’ve found a day (or afternoon) sitting in the sun wearing nothing at all can be a wonderfully relaxing time. We’d love to go more often, but I still wouldn’t call us nudist. We’re just comfortable being naked and don’t mind other people around us doing the same.

For more than 20 years, we’ve gone to nude beaches and on weekend getaways to nudist resorts and clubs. It took us time to get comfortable with the experience of being naked around other people. While there were guidebooks and some information online, there was no article telling us what to expect or how to calm our nerves.  That’s why I wrote this blog to answer the common questions when a couple are considering trying nude recreation. Here are our answers to the most common questions from couples nervous about trying a nudist camp or club this summer.

 1. Is a nudist camp a safe place? 

The best part about a nudist camp is that you can be naked without offending anyone or be worried about having your picture taken and shared all over the internet. It’s a safe place where couples, families and children spend time together enjoying being naked and as a result, great precautions are taken to make this a safe environment for everyone.

I know what you’re thinking: “We’re going to be totally naked. We’re nervous and terrified about what to expect.” Well, here is what you should expect. Call before you come so the camp will be expecting you. Tell them this is your first time and that you’re a little nervous. Trust me, they hear this all of the time. You’ll need to bring your drivers license because they will do a background check on both of you. No one gets into a nudist facility without being checked first. And no cell phones or cameras either. When you’re totally “exposed,” privacy and protection are very important. Next someone from the camp will give you a tour around the property and go through the rules. This is the intimidating part, expect everyone from the moment you come into the camp to be naked. Yes, you’re not in Kansas any more but that’s okay. Remember, that’s why you’re here. For us, the hardest part was seeing all of the naked people when we walked around the property. We were still clothed and it felt odd. We felt out of place. It passes quickly and oddly enough, you feel much more comfortable when you take your clothes off. Remember what you heard in speech class about imaging everyone in the crowd naked so that you calm down? Now you can be naked too, which brings us to the next tip.

2. What should I wear?

Okay this is probably the part you’ve been dreading the most in your mind. Our advice, smile and get it over with. Once you start breathing again and realize the sun hasn’t fallen out of the sky and that no one is shining spotlights on you, you’ll start to relax. It will take some time. Lay on your stomach if that’s more comfortable. Before you know it, you’ll be up and walking around. In an hour, you’ll wonder what you were so concerned about in the first place.

This is the hardest part for the first time couple, but here’s a thought for you. While you and your spouse have probably seen each other naked thousands of times, have you ever been naked outside in a camp setting or with people around? I’m guessing probably not and yes, if you want to add a nice new twist to your relationship, this is it. The mental picture from our very first visit to a nudist camp of watching my wife take off all but her sandals and walk from our car to the pool still is one of my best memories ever.

Our suggestion to make this as easy as possible is to wear as little as possible. Ladies don’t overdress. In fact, a sun dress with nothing on underneath works well. Guys, a loose pair of shorts (go commando) and a t-shirt are perfect. When you’re taking off layer after layer of clothing, the anxiety only increases and it takes so much longer. My wife will often wear a thong bikini underneath her skirt. Key piece of advice. Get it off quickly, find a spot by the pool and get comfortable.

3. What if someone comes over and talks to us while we’re naked?

Believe it or not, this was a big fear of ours too. Every social norm we’ve been raised with has just blown up so what am I supposed to do now especially when someone is talking to me? Look them in the eyes, put a smile on your face and start talking. The funny thing about social nudity is when you’re together with other naked people for the first time, you are very self-aware about talking to their face and not at their breasts or other parts. You’ll find, and I’m not making this up, but most times other guests/members realize you’re a first timer and leave you alone or they simply ask if you have any questions. We have never been “hit on” by another individual or couple while at a nudist camp. It’s ironic because while you’re initially terrified about showing your private parts because yours and everyone else’s is on display, it isn’t sexual. It’s very comfortable.

NOTE: While it hasn’t happened to us, Doug sent the following note. “I find that many nudist resorts, even AANR sanctioned clubs have been taken over by group swingers, so beware of “being tested for being swingers” or advanced on.” 

While this is disappointing, simply saying, “No thanks. We’re not interested,” will tell them to give you space. 

4. What if my body isn’t a 10?

Neither is mine. Just like in life, everyone looks different and if your reason for being naked is to show off or to find other 10s, you’re coming to the camp for entirely the wrong reasons.

You’ll see it all. Old and young. Short and tall. Fat and skinny. Large and small. Tan and pale. And yes, you’ll see that when we remove our clothes, we all look very differently. Different size breasts, penises, nipples, butts, etc. We really all do look different and because we all are different, you shouldn’t feel like you stand out. In fact, the only people who stand out at a nudist camp are the ones wearing clothing. No one judges.

5. So who goes to a nudist camp or who are the members?

From our experience, most nudist camp visitors are couples (some camps do not accept single men so call in advance), age 45-65 and every imaginable body shape and size. We also live in the Midwest and I’d expect more younger couples at camps on the coasts. Honestly, my one complaint is that I wish there were younger couples there. Sometimes I feel like we’re skinny dipping with our grandparents.

So who are they? They’re people just like you. From the people I’ve met, they are teachers, lawyers, business people, nurses, retirees, doctors, farmers, students, etc. There will be families there too. It’s an interesting mix of people.

6. Honestly, what if I look different down there?

I didn’t realize this was such an important question until I did some research and saw some of the more common questions were about tattoos, piercings, and shaving down there. While some clubs do prohibit jewelry down there, in most cases you’ll see it all and what you have or don’t have is fine.

The most common question is what if I have shaved it all off or what if I’m completely natural and don’t trim at all. What you’ll find is that most (not all) people (women and men) are completely shaved or very trim down there. You’ll also see a lot of pubic hair cuts such as a “soul patch” or a “landing strip.”

Tattoos are very common and in fact, it’s funny what we keep hidden from everyone except when we’re naked. You’ll see some people who appear very conservative but have a lot of hidden body art. Piercings are common with mainly nipples pierced. Occasionally you’ll see piercings on the scrotum or vulva. It’s all about personal choice.

And yes, there are many people there without tattoos, jewelry, piercings and some with pubic hair and some without. You won’t stand out at all. Don’t worry about it.

 7. My wife wants to go but what do we do if someone we know sees us?

This was probably our biggest concern and why we put it off for so long. My wife was very concerned that we would see someone we knew. Funny thing you forget is that they’re there too for the same reason you are: To be naked.  For the record, we’ve never seen anyone we knew at a nudist camp. We have however made friends at nudist camps and have seen them out at dinner or around town later. Privacy is the most important part. People simply go by their first name. They don’t share last names or where they work or where they live. Recently while on vacation in St. Maartin we met a couple on a nude beach who live less than five minutes from our home. That’s as close as we’ve come to someone knowing our little naked secret.

8. So is it really worth all of the anxiety and fear?

My only complaint with social nudity and going to a nudist camp is that we didn’t do it sooner. We’re in our 40s now and life is busier than ever. I wish we had discovered this when we had more time without the demands of kids, jobs and families.

Like anything you try for the first time, it is a little scary and intimidating but when you do this with your spouse, you’ll find that it’s a wonderful shared experience. I can’t explain it, but you will see them differently. And it’s a good thing too. It’s funny but you come here to see what it feels like to be outside and around others naked. What you find is that it becomes what the two of you do together while you’re naked, and I’m not talking about sexual intimacy either. You’ll find that you go skinny dipping, you lay out by the pool, you have lunch (we recommend bringing a picnic lunch and beverages), it’s playing volleyball or tennis, fishing, camping, it’s talking with new friends, it’s taking a long walk or sitting by a fire pit. It’s what you do together and you just happen to be naked and no one cares.

9. What if I get turned on?

I’m only including this because it is a common question too. If you’re a guy and get turned on, simply flip over on your towel or put your towel over your penis till you calm down. Honestly, it’s never happened to me because it really isn’t a sexual setting. That said, I do find it mentally very stimulating to see my wife naked outside. It’s a great mental picture just like seeing your wife or husband all dressed up in a picture. They look great. That said, there is a time for everything and sexual intimacy or touching is completely not appropriate for a nudist camp.  Don’t do it and if you see others doing it, report it to the camp management.

10. So what should we bring?

While you should wear as little as possible, do bring:

  • A towel (always sit on a towel throughout your stay);
  • Lots of sunblock or tanning lotion (you’ll be surprised how badly and how quickly you will burn when you expose parts of your body that have never seen the sun);
  • A picnic lunch or snacks (don’t forget your favorite beverage);
  • Your drivers’ license or state I.D. (remember, the background check before you enter);
  • A good book (your choice);
  • An open mind. You’re going to try something new. My guess is that you’ll really enjoy it and probably discuss coming back.

So are you ready to get naked? Check out the American Association for Nude Recreation (AANR) website to find a nudist club or resort near you.

Have any questions or thoughts to add? We’d love to hear them. Also, I’d love to spotlight more first time experiences in our blog. It’s funny how intimidating it is until you try it and then how easy and fun it quickly becomes. Remember the first time is the hardest but once you try it, you’ll see what you’ve been missing. If you have a first time experience you’d like to share, please email me. Complete privacy will be given.

Grin and Bare It: Your First Trip to a Nudist Club

 

There are a lot of misconceptions about what a nudist club is really like, especially for someone going there for the first time. It’s not a colony. Those are for ants and bees. It’s not the Friday night, swinging singles bar scene either. It’s not a “meet” market. It’s not where people go to show off their naked body in front of others or where people go to check out and stare at naked people.  Honestly, a nudist camp or club is a place where people go to be naked. They go there to enjoy everyday camp activities naked. It’s that simple.

As you know, this blog is about answering questions couples have about social nudity and about what to expect in a nude or clothing optional setting. Often that first happens on vacation at a beach or resort in the Caribbean or some other warm vacation spot.  A nudist club (although community is probably a better term) is a great place to try the nude experience too.

I believe one reason most people try nude recreation on vacation is because no one knows them. For that reason, I’m assuming most couples don’t try a nudist club first because they are worried they will see someone they know. Believe it or not, privacy is a big part of the experience. My wife and I have been to five nudist clubs throughout the Midwest in the past 20 years and we have never seen someone we knew. We’ll talk more about that later, but first let’s talk about what happens at a nudist club.

Think back to when you were younger and went away to summer camp. You went camping and had campfires. You went swimming and boating. You had picnics and bar-b-q’s. You played games like basketball, tennis and volleyball. You probably took walks in the woods or went fishing.

Now imagine everything I just said, except this time, you’re not wearing any clothing and neither is anyone else around you. That’s the nudist camp experience. Everyone is have fun outdoor and not wearing anything. No one is embarrassed. The people here are nudists and they are doing this because they want to live part of their lives without clothes on, without people gawking or staring; without people making unwanted sexual advances; and without being judged by other who are not accepting of this decision.

So why is a nudist club a good first experience for a couple considering recreational nudity? It’s about as safe an environment as you will ever be. It’s social but it’s private too. The first time my wife and I went to a nudist club, we were surprised about how relaxing it was. Yes, we were anxious because everyone was naked and that did take a little getting used to, but our nudity didn’t stand out. We looked like everyone else. Think about it. Warm all over. No worries about offending anyone. No need to explain yourself to someone who doesn’t approve, and no fear of anyone taking pictures or hitting on you or your spouse.

You’ve seen your spouse naked probably thousands of times.  Now how often have you both been completely naked outside without a fear of being seen? Have you ever been naked with them outside while hiking in the woods, swimming, playing a sport or eating dinner? It’s different and while yes, it sounds odd at first, it’s very natural and not a sexual experience.

Here are some tips that you must know to make sure it’s a good experience for you and your spouse. First of all, you need to have this conversation before you ever go to a nudist club.  Nudist clubs are nude. They are usually coops owned by members who in some cases, live there. They are not clothing optional. They are nude unless the weather calls for clothing to stay warm or dry.  This isn’t like a clothing optional beach or resort where you bear as much as you dare.  Talk to your spouse prior to going to make sure you’re comfortable with the fact you will have to take off your clothing. Wear a swimsuit. Wear a thong. No entry.

Call the club you would like to visit. Let them know you are coming out for the first time. Many camps offer a free visit for first timers. Ask them about what you should bring and get specific directions.  Many have privacy gates where you will need to be buzzed in. Know before you go. Also ask about any fees and expectations.

Bring your driver’s license or state issued ID. They will perform a background check on you when you enter. This is for their protection and for you when you arrive. Most nudist camps are family oriented. There are children there and privacy and protection for minors is the most important. No exceptions.

Most clubs do not accept single men. Couples and single woman only. There is a lot of debate about this but it seems to be important to keep the balance of men and women equal. One more reason why this is a great activity for you and your spouse. You really can’t do it alone if you’re a guy.

Bring a towel to sit on. Cleanliness is very important so bring a towel at all times so you have something to sit on.  Also, bring sun protection. When parts of your body are exposed to the sun for the first time, it can leave an awful burn if you’re not protected.

Absolutely no cameras or cell phones because they all have cameras now. While you might want to take a picture of your spouse to remember the occasion, most clubs do not allow photography of any kind, unless you’re a member. Remember, you’re there for privacy too.

Remember you are being watched while you’re there. Privacy is very important and each club watches to make sure visitors are acting as adults. Often you will have to wear a special sticker or arm band. Nudist clubs are there to enjoy being nude. Not for staring at nude men and women. Go there for you and your spouse. Not to meet anyone or to find a date. It is not a sexual experience and absolutely no inappropriate comments or sexual touching is accepted.  This is one more reason why this is a positive and safe environment to try social nudity with your spouse.

 

nudist-colony-flasher

Don’t get too personal. No one talks about where they live, work or even gives their last name. Please introduce yourself and be ready for others to say hello too. We have met many wonderful people at nudist clubs but there is always a level of privacy that is respected and maintained.

Perhaps the most difficult part of the experience is where to look when you’re talking to another naked person.  Don’t laugh but one of my funniest memories was on our honeymoon in Tahiti. Another couple from Italy had sat down beside my wife and I on the beach. While our spouses fell asleep next to us in the sun, this woman and I talked about the US and Italy. We were having a great conversation. During our discussion and while I had my eyes closed, she took off her bikini top.  My wife’s bikini top was still on at that point. When I opened my eyes and realized she was topless, I didn’t know what to do. Should I look away? Look around her? I finally made a point of talking right at her and staring right at her eyes. My eyes were glued to her eyes. To this day, I can’t tell you anything about her breast because I never once looked straight at them. I was incredibly nervous.

When you’re talking to another naked person (man or woman) look them straight in the eyes and talk. Don’t stare. Don’t point and certainly don’t say anything about their private parts. That’s rude. Before long, you won’t even notice they’re naked.

My wife and I visit a local nudist club several times each summer. It’s a great getaway from our kids and jobs where we can enjoy time together to sit by the pool, swim and enjoy a picnic lunch together. As much as we’d like to go to some super, all-inclusive in Mexico or the Caribbean, we simply don’t have the time or money. Our trips to the nudist camp are special because it’s only 30 minutes away and it’s just us.

For the right couple, a nudist camp or club can be a great first step into social nudity. In the heat of the summer, I can’t think of a better place to cool off and enjoy the weather. Interested in trying it out? Better do it quickly. Many clubs in the Eastern US only allow guests between Memorial Day and Labor Day. After that, clubs are often closed and available just for members.

Before you go, do some research online. Today there is a lot of information about each club, what to expect, fees and rules. I even found a review site for Nudist clubs and resorts.

Do you have any questions or concerns? Let us know. We’re here to answer your questions and share with you our experiences so you and your spouse have a better experience.  Enjoy.