The Only Place to Escape Body Shaming: A Nude Beach

Image is from article on ET Online: http://www.etonline.com/fashion/153293_victoria_secret_slammed_for_perfect_body_campaign_topshop_accused_of_body_shaming/

The only place I know of to escape body shaming is a nude beach, resort or campground. Sounds crazy doesn’t it? The only place to escape the unrealistic and material ideas of the perfect body is a place where your total body is on display.  Let me explain.

My wife and I have been going on nude vacations for more than 20 years. We started on our honeymoon to Bora Bora. While there aren’t any recognized nude beaches in French Polynesia, topless sunbathing and swimming is the norm. My wife was in her mid-20s and thoroughly enjoyed swimming, sunning and walking the beach without her bikini top on. I certainly didn’t mind either. To me, she is beautiful and even more so when she isn’t wearing anything to cover up.

From there we have been to many nude beaches, resorts and B&B’s. We’ve learned that when we’re nude, we’re relaxed and comfortable. For me, I can’t think of a better place than when I’m drenched in sunshine and warm all over and my wife is next to me. It is an incredible feeling to go skinny dipping in the ocean or walking on the beach in the buff with the sunshine warming us all over. We’ve met many friendly couples. All naked and all as comfortable with themselves as we are.

We’re into the final countdown before we head into a much needed tropical vacation.  Almost on cue, the weather has turned wintry in the Midwest U.S. The temperatures are the only thing falling as fast as the snow. It’s time to travel to a tropical resort and get naked. I can’t wait to get to Jamaica and to get warm all over.

My wife just returned from the store. She was looking for a sundress she could wear from our room at the resort to the nude beach and pool. I’m told it is a quick walk. I was surprised she needed a new sundress and asked why she didn’t just go naked underneath or just wear her thong bikini under her dress. That’s not what she was worried about.

While I am convinced my wife is the most beautiful woman in the world, clothed or naked, her biggest frustration with her body is her breasts. My wife is slender and lean. She wears a size 34 A cup bra. Her breasts, are not large and full and are dominated by her nipples. I say she looks great. She says she has the chest of a boy. While she likes being topless or naked on a nude beach or resort, she wants the extra padding that today’s bras provide while wearing her clothes. She doesn’t want other women or men to judge her.

Body-Shaming-body-types
Real bodies are beautiful. Love your body and love yourself! Image from the blog: http://blog.spylight.com/lets-follow-lauren-conrads-lead-and-ban-body-shaming/

Many women have the same hang ups with their bodies as my wife. Too short. Too fat. Too tall. Too skinny. Breasts not big enough. Hips too big. Breasts too big. Butt not big enough. The quest for the perfect body is punctuated by the media and Hollywood celebrities every day who have had so much work, their bodies are more fiction than fact.

It’s odd to me that my wife can be totally naked and be at peace with her body but when she wears clothes, it’s all about hiding her perceived blemishes. I know why though. Since we started going to nude resorts and beaches, we’ve learned that when you’re nude, you’re totally open. And most of the other couples we’ve met while on the beach or at the resort are equally comfortable with themselves. (It’s funny. The only time I’m uncomfortable is when someone is wearing clothing and I’m naked.) That’s one of the reasons I like going to nude places. Real, honest people who care less about what you look like and are more interested in who you are and where you’re from.

Very few people know we go on nude vacations. The few that do all ask the same questions, “Isn’t everyone fat?” or “See any 1o’s there?” In all honestly, what we see is real people who enjoy being naked and enjoy their bodies just the way they are. In many cases, they are just like us. Wonderfully average. They’re from all walks of life. Some are older. Some are younger. Some are gay. Some are grandparents. Some are tattooed and pierced in places I didn’t know could have body art or jewelry. Others clearly have never been in a nude social environment and I’m sure by looking at their tan lines, they’ve never been naked outside before. I’ve also seen many courageous, nude people. Here’s what I mean:

  • The cute, older couple we met at Hidden Beach Resort who played in the pool like teenagers. She had had a double mastectomy.
  • A heavier couple who saw us skinny dipping on the beach in Tulum, Mexico. They didn’t stare. They smiled. When we saw them later on they were walking hand-in-hand and totally naked in the waves.
  • The very pregnant woman and her husband at Haulover Beach in Miami who looked like she was ready to go into labor atany minute. She was probably larger than she would ever be in her life but she was smiling, warm and comfortable. She was awesomely beautiful.
  • And the young college couple that wandered on Orient Beach in St. Maartin from a cruise ship. They looked out of place at first. He was naked and trying to make sure she was comfortable. She was very nervous and appeared to be comparing her body to every woman on the beach. I could hear him trying to encouraging her by telling her she was as beautiful as any woman  with or without her bathing suit. Throughout the day she slowly took off her bikini top and later her bottoms. By the end of the day, they were splashing in the waves and holding hands walking down the beach.

The next time you think of an open and safe place to be yourself with your spouse, consider a nude place. You’ll find that it isn’t about seeing other naked people or comparing your body to their’s. It’s about being comfortable in your own skin and accepting of others. It’s getting to know your own body and realizing just how beautiful it is. It’s practicing body acceptance for yourself and the people around you. Most importantly, it’s a judge free zone. And, spending time with your spouse naked is a great way to reconnect and relax. It really is a beautiful thing.

Here is an article from the website YesandYes.org about the authors trip to a nudist resort and how it helped her love her body. I love it. I think you will too. She hits on exactly the key points I’m making in my blog article. Enjoy.

 

 

 

 

Make it a Happy Nude Year for Her

Photo credit from the blog Better Than Surviving

So is one of your New Year’s resolutions to go topless on a beach? Or are you thinking of adding skinny dipping to your bucket list? How about taking a nude vacation aka nakation? There is no better time than 2016 to see what visiting a nude beach or resort really feels like. It’s not what you expect.

My wife and I have been writing this blog for more than two years now. We’ve detailed our experiences visiting nude and clothing optional resorts, B&B, beaches and clubs all over the U.S., Mexico, South Pacific and Caribbean. Our time naked on vacation is some of the best quality time we have together. It’s fun. It’s relaxing. It’s great we time. It’s very romantic but not in a sexual way. I’ll explain more later. And our blog is here to help and encourage other couples to give it a try.

I was reviewing the search terms people use to find our blog over the past year and a lot of them are related to what to expect at a nude beach or resort and about convincing wives and girlfriends to give it a try….

  • How do I convince my wife to try a nude beach?
  • How do we try a nude beach?
  • Wife worried about sunbathing topless
  • What are nude beaches/resorts like for women?

Going back 20 years ago, my wife (then girlfriend) had the same apprehensions about going to a nude beach. She liked the idea of being naked outside with me, but was concerned about the people we would meet and other women and men viewing and rating her body.

From what I’ve seen and heard from my own wife over the years, these are all honest questions and concerns. To someone who hasn’t been topless or nude on a beach, the thought of being completely naked and exposed and happy and comfortable seems impossible. It’s really not.

For any husband or boyfriend who would like to visit a nude beach or resort with their spouse, here is some advice from my wife and me. The key is to ensure it’s a safe and relaxing place so she (and you) can become comfortable with your nakedness. Here are our tips:

Talk. Have an open and honest discussion about sunbathing nude, going topless or skinny dipping. Why do you want to do it and what’s to be gained by doing it? We have found it’s a wonderful shared experience. It’s a thrill like the first time you hold hands or kiss.

Never surprise your wife with a trip to a nude beach or resort without discussing it first. Chances are she’ll say she likes the thought of being naked with you, it’s just the other people at the beach or resort who will see her that she is uncomfortable with. That’s an honest concern and until you’ve tried it, you don’t realize that it’s really not about other people. It’s about being comfortable in your own skin. So how do you do that? Here is a blog we wrote on the talk before you drop your swimsuit.

couple in water
Spending time together nude can be the ultimate romantic getawway. Image from A well traveled woman on Tumblr.

 

Have a Plan. Maybe a trip to a nude resort isn’t the best first step. Perhaps a better solution is going to a resort that allows topless sunbathing or has a nude beach. Or go to a clothing optional beach and bare as much as you want until you’re comfortable with taking your bathing suit off. For example, the Couples Resorts in Jamaica all offer sections where women can sunbath topless or couples can be nude for swimming or sunbathing. Or go to a nude beach like Haulover in Miami or Black’s Beach in San Diego.  These are recognized nude beaches, patrolled by police with lifeguards and volunteers to ensure a fun and safe environment.

Take Your Time. This is probably the most important piece of advice my wife shared . If you’re at a resort that offers a nude or topless section, find a spot where you have space and can be comfortable together. Don’t worry about anyone else. Just concentrate on one another. It should be romantic time for the two of you.

If you’re at a nude public beach, it’s best not to stray too far away from everyone. Better yet, look for other couples and set up 10-15 yards from them.  Before long you’ll have your own safe space and then do what you’d normally do. Set up your towel or beach chairs. Put up the umbrella. Get out your tanning lotion and sun glasses. The key here is to be comfortable in your space by the beach or pool.

Ease into Being Naked. If you’re at a resort and want to try going topless, take off your bikini top and put on suntan lotion. It will feel odd and a little scary at first. If you’re feeling too anxious, then turn over on to your stomach and give yourself time to get comfortable. Don’t worry about who is watching. From our experience, the only time anyone ever really notices you on a nude beach is when you’re still wearing clothing. Chances are no one is watching at all. Once you’re naked, you really just blend in. From our experience, if you’re at the nude section of the resort the best thing to do is not to think about it. Drop your bathing suit, lie down on your chair or towel and relax. Again, lay on your stomach if you’re too nervous (we’ve all seen butts before, right?). If you’re at a nude beach, take off your bathing suit as you choose to do it.

Here is the Key: Get Comfortable in Your Own Skin. From our experience of watching couples do this countless times, one of two things happens next. She or he can’t get comfortable. They try to but it’s obvious that they aren’t enjoying this experience at all. It’s anything but romantic. They usually last for an hour or less and then put on their swim suits and leave. There is nothing wrong with this. Nude recreation isn’t for everyone. That’s okay. Not everyone likes football or baseball either. You gave it a shot.

The other option is that the two of you have fun. You get comfortable with being naked outside together. You feel the warmth of the sun. You decide to jump in the pool or go skinny dipping in the ocean. Or go for a walk on the beach. It goes from being an odd foreign experience to one that is empowering, liberating, FUN and very romantic. Often a transformation takes place. While the initial thought of being naked outside where other people could see you caused a lot of stress and anxiety, after the first day you’ll find yourself wanting to get to the beach or pool sooner and to stay longer because it’s such a wonderful feeling of openness and togetherness. There is a thrill because you’re enjoying it together.

It’s at this point that you’ll see it’s not a sexual experience. I’d be lying to you if I told you that seeing my wife laying out on the beach or walking around the pool naked isn’t a turn on to me. It is but not physically. It’s mental. To me, she is still the most beautiful woman in the world and seeing her like this only adds to her beauty. The resorts and beaches I mentioned all have strict policies against public sexual touching and intimacy. I’m not saying it doesn’t happen but there are rules and people who will enforce it if they see it. From our experience, this shouldn’t be one of your concerns.

Often times it takes a few times to get comfortable. A couple we met on a nude beach in Hawaii told us they had been going to nude beaches for years but she would only go topless and only if no one else was nearby. Finally she decided that her husband looked great naked and she wanted to join him. When we were in St. Martin last year, a couple sat down next to us on Orient Beach. They had gotten off a cruise ship and it was obvious they had a plan. He immediately striped while she took more time to get comfortable. When she pulled off her sarong, she was wearing one of the smallest thong bikinis I had ever seen. She spent the day wearing her thong bikini while her husband was nude. They had a blast. She was comfortable and they had fun together. Even my wife still will wear a towel around her waist when we first arrive at a resort. She doesn’t mind going topless but wear it to cover up when she goes to the beach bar or back to our room. Usually by the end of the day, she has dropped the towel and is now comfortable walking around the beach or pool nude.

I don’t envy my wife or other women. The stigma tied to body shape and how a “good” girl is supposed to act in public is overwhelming. Perhaps the most upsetting emails I’ve received are from women who believe they are too fat or their breasts are too small or they’re not pretty enough to spend time on a nude beach. I’m very sorry for them. It shouldn’t be like this. These are powerful mental roadblocks that some women will never overcome.

So support your wife and respect her. By making this a shared experience and by concentrating on her and letting her decide what to do next, we believe the two of you will discover that being naked together outside is one of the most enriching and thrilling experiences you can have together. And it doesn’t matter if you’ve been together six months or 50 years, my wife and I still get excited when we first take off our bathing suits and relax together on a warm, sunny beach.

Here is a blog post that a couple sent to me after reading our blog. Note that they went to the Hedonism Resort in Jamaica which does allow public sexual contact. My wife and I would never go there because that’s not our idea of fun, but that’s us.

I’ve shared our thoughts and experiences. I’d like to hear yours. Especially if you’re a woman who enjoys nude recreation and travel or are still considering it. Great post

 

 

 

 

Trading in Your Bathing Suit for your Birthday Suit: 10 Things to Do Naked with Your Spouse this Summer

 

Image from http://great-naked-outdoors.tumblr.com/
Image from http://great-naked-outdoors.tumblr.com/

Have you ever spent the day naked with your spouse? I’m not talking about laying in bed all day or taking a shower together naked. I’m talking about spending the day, as in outside, doing things together in the buff.

Sound crazy? It might if you’ve never been to a nude resort, club, campground or beach. I spent all day with my wife naked at a local nudist club this past weekend.  It was wonderful. We laid out in the sun, we went skinny dipping in the pool, we ate lunch together, we went on a hike and we talked with other couples enjoying the day the same way we were.

We laughed. We napped. We relaxed. And we did it all naked, outside on a sunny, warm day. In the nearly three years I’ve been writing this blog, by far and away the most asked question that brings visitors to our blog is some version of, “How do I convince my wife to go naked outside with me.” It might be a beach. It might be on vacation. It might be to a clothing optional club or resort. My suggestion: talk with her about what you would do naked together.

From our experience, being naked together in a safe environment like a nude resort, camp or beach is time well spent. By removing your bathing suit and trading it for your birthday suit, you’ll experience what I would call one of life’s biggest and often last emotional highs. Think about it? Your entire life you’ve been told to cover up and to hide your body and now you’re letting it out and showing it off. The irony is that you’ll find that you and your spouse will notice each other, but to everyone else, you’re just naked. Remember the only time you stand out at a nude or clothing optional location is when you’re wearing clothing. Not when you’re naked.

So what should you do when you and your spouse are naked for the first time together? Here is our official list of must do’s when you spend the day naked at a nude camp, resort or beach.

  1. Sunbath naked. This might seem like a no brainer, but until you’ve laid out on a pool chair or on a towel with your spouse and felt the sun’s rays warming your body, you really haven’t lived. To my wife and me, feeling warm all over is an amazing feeling and even better when we’re sitting next to one another.
  2. Go skinny dipping. There is something wonderful about swimming naked. Feeling the water embracing your body is magical.To me, skinny dipping really is the fountain of youth. I feel like I’m a teenager again. In a pool, lake or ocean, it all feels great. And there is something fantastic about jumping into the waves or into a pool with your spouse beside you.
  3. Picnic nude. Sitting out together at a picnic table or underneath a tree and enjoying a picnic lunch together remains a must do for us. I don’t know why, but this one of our favorite activities. Think about it. You’re enjoying food, talking and relaxing with your spouse and naked from head to foot. What could be better?
  4. Take a hike in the woods. I don’t know why but for me, I love walking and talking with my wife either on a road or  a trail in the forest and wearing only our shoes.  Many nudist locations are in the country and have trails to explore or roads to walk. Just remember a little bug spray will go along way.
  5. Have a beer. Liquid courage has convinced more than one worried wife to try taking it all off. For us, mimosas on the beach in the morning at a nude resort or an ice cold beer in the afternoon next to the pool is a must when we’re together naked on a hot, sunny day.
  6. Row, row, row your boat. While we’ve always wanted to try a nude cruise or nude sailing, one of our first nude experiences was in a canoe in Tahiti on our honeymoon. It was simple. While canoeing through a beautiful tropical lagoon, my wife removed her bikini top. I took off my bathing suit. She untied her bikini bottoms. That was it. We explored the lagoon together and didn’t put our suits back on all day.
  7. Take a walk on the beach. It doesn’t matter if it’s a crowded beach or if there is hardly anyone there. Walking the beach together in the buff is a must whenever we’re on vacation. There is just something about holding hands and walking together in the surf that makes a vacation.
  8. Shower outdoors. I would never have thought that showering together in an outdoor shower would make our list, but we both agreed, there is something familiar yet surprisingly different about showering outside. Think about it, most showers are small and confining. An outdoor shower is wide open. It’s not sexual. It’s cleansing and freeing.
  9. Take a naked nap. There is something so special to me to be so exposed yet feel so relaxed and safe that I fall asleep. A naked nap during the afternoon is a must and even better when you fall asleep next to or with your spouse.
  10. Strike up a naked conversation. You never know who you might meet on a nude beach, resort or camp. We’ve meet so many wonderful people. It’s funny how open and honest you are and the people you meet when you’re totally exposed and not hiding behind clothing. The best questions to ask? “Is this your first time here?” and “Where else have you and your spouse been naked?” You’ll find out a lot about great nude places to visit and other couples stories about their journeys into social nudity.

So what would you add to our list? What have you and your spouse done that you would recommend other couples try naked for the first time? Or if you and your spouse haven’t experienced a nude or clothing optional location together before, what do you want to do? I’d really like to hear your ideas. I’d also like to hear from women. Privacy will be maintained.  No names given. Just your ideas. 🙂

Notice I didn’t say anything about sex, touching or intimacy. Most people who have never been to a nudist location or a clothing optional setting, assume that nudity must lead to sex and/or physical intimacy. There is a place and a time for physical intimacy and a nudist location where there are other people, families and children present is not the place or the time. This will sound weird but it’s honestly one of the most non-sexual settings you’ll ever encounter. However, after spending time together naked all day, I will tell you that later that night in the privacy of our own home, we usually enjoy a wonderful and very physical time together. I believe, it is deeply intimate because of the time we spend together during the day.

It’s Summer. It’s Time to Get Naked! Ten answers to your naked questions.

Photo from http://hcb4.tumblr.com/
Photo from http://hcb4.tumblr.com/

It’s summer! The sun is shining and the temperatures are finally heating up. For most of us, our thoughts turn to weekend cookouts, baseball games, swimming pools and fire pits.

It’s also a great time to go outside and get naked. Most nudist camps, clubs and resorts allow guests to try their facilities from Memorial Day to Labor Day. While it may sound a little intimidating at first, a nudist camp is a great way to learn more about nude recreation and can be a great experience for you and your spouse.

My wife and I are not nudist. We don’t sit around the house naked or garden in the buff. It doesn’t fit with our lifestyle, however when we can get some time away from our family, jobs, and other commitments, we’ve found a day (or afternoon) sitting in the sun wearing nothing at all can be a wonderfully relaxing time. We’d love to go more often, but I still wouldn’t call us nudist. We’re just comfortable being naked and don’t mind other people around us doing the same.

For more than 20 years, we’ve gone to nude beaches and on weekend getaways to nudist resorts and clubs. It took us time to get comfortable with the experience of being naked around other people. While there were guidebooks and some information online, there was no article telling us what to expect or how to calm our nerves.  That’s why I wrote this blog to answer the common questions when a couple are considering trying nude recreation. Here are our answers to the most common questions from couples nervous about trying a nudist camp or club this summer.

 1. Is a nudist camp a safe place? 

The best part about a nudist camp is that you can be naked without offending anyone or be worried about having your picture taken and shared all over the internet. It’s a safe place where couples, families and children spend time together enjoying being naked and as a result, great precautions are taken to make this a safe environment for everyone.

I know what you’re thinking: “We’re going to be totally naked. We’re nervous and terrified about what to expect.” Well, here is what you should expect. Call before you come so the camp will be expecting you. Tell them this is your first time and that you’re a little nervous. Trust me, they hear this all of the time. You’ll need to bring your drivers license because they will do a background check on both of you. No one gets into a nudist facility without being checked first. And no cell phones or cameras either. When you’re totally “exposed,” privacy and protection are very important. Next someone from the camp will give you a tour around the property and go through the rules. This is the intimidating part, expect everyone from the moment you come into the camp to be naked. Yes, you’re not in Kansas any more but that’s okay. Remember, that’s why you’re here. For us, the hardest part was seeing all of the naked people when we walked around the property. We were still clothed and it felt odd. We felt out of place. It passes quickly and oddly enough, you feel much more comfortable when you take your clothes off. Remember what you heard in speech class about imaging everyone in the crowd naked so that you calm down? Now you can be naked too, which brings us to the next tip.

2. What should I wear?

Okay this is probably the part you’ve been dreading the most in your mind. Our advice, smile and get it over with. Once you start breathing again and realize the sun hasn’t fallen out of the sky and that no one is shining spotlights on you, you’ll start to relax. It will take some time. Lay on your stomach if that’s more comfortable. Before you know it, you’ll be up and walking around. In an hour, you’ll wonder what you were so concerned about in the first place.

This is the hardest part for the first time couple, but here’s a thought for you. While you and your spouse have probably seen each other naked thousands of times, have you ever been naked outside in a camp setting or with people around? I’m guessing probably not and yes, if you want to add a nice new twist to your relationship, this is it. The mental picture from our very first visit to a nudist camp of watching my wife take off all but her sandals and walk from our car to the pool still is one of my best memories ever.

Our suggestion to make this as easy as possible is to wear as little as possible. Ladies don’t overdress. In fact, a sun dress with nothing on underneath works well. Guys, a loose pair of shorts (go commando) and a t-shirt are perfect. When you’re taking off layer after layer of clothing, the anxiety only increases and it takes so much longer. My wife will often wear a thong bikini underneath her skirt. Key piece of advice. Get it off quickly, find a spot by the pool and get comfortable.

3. What if someone comes over and talks to us while we’re naked?

Believe it or not, this was a big fear of ours too. Every social norm we’ve been raised with has just blown up so what am I supposed to do now especially when someone is talking to me? Look them in the eyes, put a smile on your face and start talking. The funny thing about social nudity is when you’re together with other naked people for the first time, you are very self-aware about talking to their face and not at their breasts or other parts. You’ll find, and I’m not making this up, but most times other guests/members realize you’re a first timer and leave you alone or they simply ask if you have any questions. We have never been “hit on” by another individual or couple while at a nudist camp. It’s ironic because while you’re initially terrified about showing your private parts because yours and everyone else’s is on display, it isn’t sexual. It’s very comfortable.

NOTE: While it hasn’t happened to us, Doug sent the following note. “I find that many nudist resorts, even AANR sanctioned clubs have been taken over by group swingers, so beware of “being tested for being swingers” or advanced on.” 

While this is disappointing, simply saying, “No thanks. We’re not interested,” will tell them to give you space. 

4. What if my body isn’t a 10?

Neither is mine. Just like in life, everyone looks different and if your reason for being naked is to show off or to find other 10s, you’re coming to the camp for entirely the wrong reasons.

You’ll see it all. Old and young. Short and tall. Fat and skinny. Large and small. Tan and pale. And yes, you’ll see that when we remove our clothes, we all look very differently. Different size breasts, penises, nipples, butts, etc. We really all do look different and because we all are different, you shouldn’t feel like you stand out. In fact, the only people who stand out at a nudist camp are the ones wearing clothing. No one judges.

5. So who goes to a nudist camp or who are the members?

From our experience, most nudist camp visitors are couples (some camps do not accept single men so call in advance), age 45-65 and every imaginable body shape and size. We also live in the Midwest and I’d expect more younger couples at camps on the coasts. Honestly, my one complaint is that I wish there were younger couples there. Sometimes I feel like we’re skinny dipping with our grandparents.

So who are they? They’re people just like you. From the people I’ve met, they are teachers, lawyers, business people, nurses, retirees, doctors, farmers, students, etc. There will be families there too. It’s an interesting mix of people.

6. Honestly, what if I look different down there?

I didn’t realize this was such an important question until I did some research and saw some of the more common questions were about tattoos, piercings, and shaving down there. While some clubs do prohibit jewelry down there, in most cases you’ll see it all and what you have or don’t have is fine.

The most common question is what if I have shaved it all off or what if I’m completely natural and don’t trim at all. What you’ll find is that most (not all) people (women and men) are completely shaved or very trim down there. You’ll also see a lot of pubic hair cuts such as a “soul patch” or a “landing strip.”

Tattoos are very common and in fact, it’s funny what we keep hidden from everyone except when we’re naked. You’ll see some people who appear very conservative but have a lot of hidden body art. Piercings are common with mainly nipples pierced. Occasionally you’ll see piercings on the scrotum or vulva. It’s all about personal choice.

And yes, there are many people there without tattoos, jewelry, piercings and some with pubic hair and some without. You won’t stand out at all. Don’t worry about it.

 7. My wife wants to go but what do we do if someone we know sees us?

This was probably our biggest concern and why we put it off for so long. My wife was very concerned that we would see someone we knew. Funny thing you forget is that they’re there too for the same reason you are: To be naked.  For the record, we’ve never seen anyone we knew at a nudist camp. We have however made friends at nudist camps and have seen them out at dinner or around town later. Privacy is the most important part. People simply go by their first name. They don’t share last names or where they work or where they live. Recently while on vacation in St. Maartin we met a couple on a nude beach who live less than five minutes from our home. That’s as close as we’ve come to someone knowing our little naked secret.

8. So is it really worth all of the anxiety and fear?

My only complaint with social nudity and going to a nudist camp is that we didn’t do it sooner. We’re in our 40s now and life is busier than ever. I wish we had discovered this when we had more time without the demands of kids, jobs and families.

Like anything you try for the first time, it is a little scary and intimidating but when you do this with your spouse, you’ll find that it’s a wonderful shared experience. I can’t explain it, but you will see them differently. And it’s a good thing too. It’s funny but you come here to see what it feels like to be outside and around others naked. What you find is that it becomes what the two of you do together while you’re naked, and I’m not talking about sexual intimacy either. You’ll find that you go skinny dipping, you lay out by the pool, you have lunch (we recommend bringing a picnic lunch and beverages), it’s playing volleyball or tennis, fishing, camping, it’s talking with new friends, it’s taking a long walk or sitting by a fire pit. It’s what you do together and you just happen to be naked and no one cares.

9. What if I get turned on?

I’m only including this because it is a common question too. If you’re a guy and get turned on, simply flip over on your towel or put your towel over your penis till you calm down. Honestly, it’s never happened to me because it really isn’t a sexual setting. That said, I do find it mentally very stimulating to see my wife naked outside. It’s a great mental picture just like seeing your wife or husband all dressed up in a picture. They look great. That said, there is a time for everything and sexual intimacy or touching is completely not appropriate for a nudist camp.  Don’t do it and if you see others doing it, report it to the camp management.

10. So what should we bring?

While you should wear as little as possible, do bring:

  • A towel (always sit on a towel throughout your stay);
  • Lots of sunblock or tanning lotion (you’ll be surprised how badly and how quickly you will burn when you expose parts of your body that have never seen the sun);
  • A picnic lunch or snacks (don’t forget your favorite beverage);
  • Your drivers’ license or state I.D. (remember, the background check before you enter);
  • A good book (your choice);
  • An open mind. You’re going to try something new. My guess is that you’ll really enjoy it and probably discuss coming back.

So are you ready to get naked? Check out the American Association for Nude Recreation (AANR) website to find a nudist club or resort near you.

Have any questions or thoughts to add? We’d love to hear them. Also, I’d love to spotlight more first time experiences in our blog. It’s funny how intimidating it is until you try it and then how easy and fun it quickly becomes. Remember the first time is the hardest but once you try it, you’ll see what you’ve been missing. If you have a first time experience you’d like to share, please email me. Complete privacy will be given.

Naked and Not Afraid… One Couple’s First Time Nude Vacation Experience

The Hedonism II Resort offers a nude pool and beach.
The Hedonism II Resort offers a nude pool and beach.

When my wife and I started this blog nearly two years ago, our goal was to share information and advice with other couples who hadn’t tried but wanted to experience a shared naked experience. We’ve found it to be a wonderful getaway for the two of us away from our jobs, kids and other commitments. Our only mistake was not trying it sooner.

As most bloggers will tell you, often you wonder if anyone really reads what you write. I know we have a very popular blog with more than 350 views per day, but only once in a great while do we receive an email like the one below.
Mr. C had read our blog and asked some questions on a trip he and his wife were discussing. They had never gone anywhere were they could be nude and were excited and nervous at the idea of it. We traded emails and I recommended how to prepare both of them for the experience. What to expect, etc.  I didn’t hear anything else until a few weeks ago. I asked Mr. C if I could share his account of he and his wife’s first nude vacation experience. His feelings, thoughts and experience are very common. I really appreciate him sharing. Read on.
“Well we did it! We just returned from our vacation in the Caribbean where we dared to do the unthinkable. After some debate months ago we decided to book a couple of days of our vacation at an adults only resort that had a nude beach. Both my wife and I were a little nervous about what was to come but figured we’d see what came of it.
In the weeks leading up to the trip we discussed a game plan of exactly what and how we would do this. We were scheduled to arrive mid afternoon while their was plenty of daylight and beach time still available. We decided that perhaps we should help things along with some liquid courage considering how outside our comfort zone this was.
Upon arrival at the Hedonism II Resort, we were supplied with a cocktail while we were checked in and shown to our room. These went down surprising quickly. Once we were in our room, my wife asked if I would go to the bar and get us another round. Knowing how nervous she was I immediately headed off to the bar. The bar was located adjacent to one of the large pools available on the resort, which at this particular time had a lot of people partying and enjoying themselves. As I approach the bar area I noticed more and more nude people coming into my view and the reality of where we were hit me. Having never been in this type of environment before I was uncertain what the atmosphere would be like. It seemed pretty free and I could not help but notice that these people didn’t seem to be the least bit self conscience about being nude in front of strangers.
  
We read up on the possibility of what are commonly referred to as public displays of affection (PDAs) happening in open areas at these types of resorts. As I was waiting at the bar I looked over across the pool area to where two men were sitting on the edge of the pool nude with their legs dangling in the water. In front of them fully submersed in the water, were what I assume to be their wives. The strangest part was the two men continued to chat while their wives pleasured them simultaneously. I decided to act as casual as I could and head back to the room realizing that I wasn’t in Kansas anymore. Upon arrival back to the room I told my wife what I had seen just moments before just to make sure she knew what was coming and to lessen the possible shock factor that she may encounter.
(NOTE: From everything I’ve read, public sexual activity at Hedonism isn’t uncommon. Most nudist resorts and beaches do not allow any physical touching. For example, Hidden Beach Resort in Mexico makes everyone sign a statement saying they won’t engage in any public sexual activity. As I’ve mentioned many times before, there is a time and place for everything and that while it’s great to enjoy time with your spouse nude, sexual intimacy should be done in private. What Mr. & Mrs. C saw at Hedonism is not the norm at most clothing optional properties unless they advertise otherwise.)
Our plan was to walk straight down to the nude beach and where the sign says “no clothing allowed beyond this point” and drop our laundry and get it over with. With that in mind I was wondering if we had the intestinal fortitude to follow through. Amazingly without hesitation we both followed through, I took my shorts off and my wife took her dress off (she wasn’t wearing anything under it) and we continued to walk straight down the beach to the bar and ordered another cocktail.
It was exhilarating and frightening all at the same time but it seemed that the longer we walked with nothing but a smile on the more comfortable we both became. After about an hour it seemed like it was something we had been doing for years.
The next day we were up very early and made our way to the dining area had a quick breakfast and it was off to the nude beach again. This time without even a second thought we both disrobed and once again found ourselves naked in front of a beach full of people. Our day was spent swimming in the caribbean sea and sunbathing on the beach. We both became very comfortable more because of the other people that were there than anything else. Nobody was gawking, nobody was critical of our body image, in fact nobody seemed to care if we were naked or not. My wife suggested we make a quick trip to our room to grab a few things we had forgotten to bring down with us. As my wife stood up and headed in the direction of our room, much to my amazement, she did not put her dress back on. I figured I’d play along and thought perhaps she would throw it on when we reached the edge of the beach, that didn’t happen. The entire walk to our room was done completely nude and so to was the return trip to the beach. We walked among clothed people in both directions, strangely enough it didn’t seem to bother either one of us.
The next morning before we were due to check out my wife suggested we get down to the nude beach for a last little bit. When we got to the beach it was a beautiful morning and not a person in sight. My wife immediately told me to pull out the camera and start shooting. The result was some of the best shots I have ever taken of my sexy wife.
In the end we have both decided we would like to do this again and are making plans to return.
Thank again for your advice.”
Except for the PDA around the pool, Mr. & Mrs. C’s first time experience at a nude beach is very common. You’re nervous and uptight. You feel like you’re breaking all the rules, but once you calm down and realize that it’s okay, that no one cares and that it is valuable time between you and your spouse, it becomes so natural. You’re no longer Naked and Afraid, but rather Comfortable and Happy.
If you have a first time experience, we’d love to read it and possibly share it too. Also please ask any questions you have about trying nude recreation.

We are All Naked People

 

What does our clothing say about us and what are we hiding?
What does our clothing say about us and what are we hiding?

In the past year, I can’t begin to tell you how many emails I’ve received from people concerned about their appearance on a nude beach. They honestly don’t believe anyone would want to see them naked.

That’s not why we go to a nude beach. You go because of how you feel when you’re free of clothing and exposed to the sun, the surf and your spouse. It’s one of the most incredible feelings I’ve ever felt and you can’t really experience it unless you’ve stripped down and let the sun warm your entire body. It has nothing to do with how you look.

Neither my wife or I are “10s.”  To be honest, to me my wife is a 20, but she would tell you that her hips are too big, her breasts too small and after nursing two boys, her nipples are too long. I would tell you she’s perfect. Me, I’d like to lose a few pounds, put on some muscle and of course, be a little bigger down there. But after more than 40 years, what you see is what you get.

We all hide behind masks. Think about it. Clothing or a bathing suit mask us from others. Just like Halloween, we mask who we really are for something else. In five minutes, we learn a lot about people simply be seeing what they wear.

Recently I found a website that captures this thought beautifully. I’d like to share it with you now. It’s a website project called, Naked People.  I love their words on the topic:

“Clothing is our second skin. It disguises, reveals- it can reflect our innermost being or conceal it. Through one’s clothing, he or she is able to exhibit his or her profession, social status, or mood. A suit lets us assume the bearer is a banker, office worker, insurance agent… In our society this is a distinguishing characteristic of respectability. But, how often is such an assumption true? Can we absolutely trust this covering? What really is underneath? Could the illusion be destroyed at the discovery of a tattoo, or leave the person as inscrutable as before? Here we have the opportunity to see the differences in perception between a person dressed and undressed.”

As you can see, clothing really does hide us. When you’re without your mask, you often meet the most wonderful people because they aren’t hiding anything either.

My wife and I have a game we play similar to this website. We play it when we go to a clothing optional beach like Haulover in Miami. We watch couples coming onto the beach and look at what they are wearing. We try to guess if they are conservative or liberal, if they are restrained or a little wild? We guess if they will or won’t get naked? We guess if he or she will get naked first. We guess if they have tattoos. We guess if they have piercings.

Sounds a little immature doesn’t it? You’re right. It is. But I can honestly tell you that I’ve learned a lot through this simple game. Clothing is very deceiving. We all judge people by what they wear and immediately make assumptions about who they are and what they will do on a clothing optional beach.

The one thing we’ve learned is there is nothing consistent about this game. More than once, I’ve bet my wife about a modest couple coming down to the beach and said there is no way she will go more than topless. Later I was shocked to find that she not only shed all of her clothing, but had piercings all over her body and very large tattoos. Same with guy who appears hip and cool when he walks onto the beach, but starts sweating the moment his spouse takes off her top. You can tell he isn’t getting naked, no how, no way.

What was your first experience on a nude beach or clothing optional resort? Were you surprised by what you felt when your clothing mask came off? I would love to hear your thoughts. Remember, regardless of what clothing we wear, we are all naked people.

 

My Naked Travel List of Resorts and Beaches for 2015

Club Orient is on the famous Orient Beach in St. Martin.
Club Orient is on the famous Orient Beach in St. Martin.

It’s been another beautiful weekend here in the Midwest. Bright sunshine and stunning fall colors. While the sights outside are amazing, my thoughts are already turning to January when it will be cold and miserable outside. I have no problems with snow, but I do like to escape the cold and find the sunshine to feel warm again.

So last night I started doing searches for nude and clothing optional resorts, beaches and locations I’d love to visit in a few months when the temperatures here hit the 20s and snow is the forecast for the week. This is my list of places my wife and I would like to visit when we’re ready to escape the frozen North.

Note that there are so many wonderful places to go now with many resorts catering to the nude or clothing optional lifestyle. My wife and I aren’t everyday nudists. We have found that taking a trip to a resort or beach sans clothing is our idea of the perfect vacation. If you have been to any of these resorts or locations, please join the conversation and share your thoughts with us. I would love to hear more about what you liked, didn’t or what you would add to the list. So, here is My Naked Travel List for the Winter 2015 (in no specific order):

 

Who says you can't be naked at night? Mak Nuk Village in Tulum has a wonderful pool area
Who says you can’t be naked at night? Mak Nuk Village in Tulum has a wonderful pool area

Mak Nuk Village Clothing Optional Resort Tulum (Mexico) – This one has been on our list for some time. As we’ve mentioned before, my wife and I are big fans of Hidden Beach Resort. It is a truly first class experience that unfortunately comes with a first class price tag too. It’s very expensive. It also has an awful beach. Perfect for wading but that’s about it. Which is why I so want to visit Mak Nuk Village. No it doesn’t have a beach but they will take you to the nude beaches of Tulum, which are wonderful. They also offer great accommodations, pool, lazy river, hot tub and on-site dining. The pictures look great. Need I say more? Mak Nuk is not all inclusive but you pay for your beverages and dinners when you depart so no need to keep money on your naked body. I’m honestly ready to go now. Check out their website and let me know what you think.

Could a naked vacation be any more romantic than in a setting like  Villa Dolce Vida in Tulum?
Could a naked vacation be any more romantic than in a setting like Villa Dolce Vida in Tulum?

Villa Dolce Vita (also in Tulum, Mexico)– Years ago my wife and I stayed at a small beach front property in Tulum. We had miles of white sand beaches to ourselves and played, swam and slept naked in the sun all day long. It was wonderful and I believe Villa Dolce Vita could be our new favorite getaway. It’s small, personal, romantic, clothing optional and right on the beach. After looking at these pictures, I can almost feel the sun on my back. Secluded and romanic. This is why you go to a B&B like this one. It has two guest rooms. This could be a perfect setting for first timers who want to bare as much as they dare without an audience. Not an all inclusive but looks like the perfect setting for a nude vacation. Have you been there before?

 

Firefly Beach Cottages in Negril, Jamaica.
Firefly Beach Cottages in Negril, Jamaica.

Firefly Beach Cottages (Negril, Jamaica) – We’ve never gone to Jamaica but I’ve been checking out this place online for years. It’s on Negril’s famous seven-mile beach but it is away from the crowds. It’s everything you’re looking for in an island vacation. Relaxed, slow and romantic. It offers personalized services and accommodations. I like that it’s small which could be perfect for the first time, naked vacationing couple but central to the beach and other restaurants. Looks like our kind of place. The reviews look great too.

Club Orient with its distinctive yellow umbrellas
Club Orient with its distinctive yellow umbrellas

Club Orient (St. Martin) – This was the first nude resort in the Caribbean and many would still say the best. We visited St. Martin’s Orient Beach nearly 15 years ago and loved it. Not sure which was more fun; laying out and soaking up the sun in the buff or watching all of the Cruisers (people visiting from cruise ships) go through the shock and awe of walking the beach with naked people and then relaxing and taking off their swimsuits and enjoying the beach with the rest of us. Truth be told, every beach on St. Martin is topless and most are clothing optional too. I would have a great time visiting a different beach every day and enjoying the terrific French restaurants each night, but there is something to be said for never having to put on clothing from the moment you wake up till you go to bed at night. Club Orient has a restaurant, nice accommodations and a perfect location (although I’d still recommend getting a car). It is very popular with Europeans and families. We would love to finally say that we’ve stayed at Club O.

What could be more relaxing than this? Caliente Caribe Resort, Dominican Republic
What could be more relaxing than this? Caliente Caribe Resort, Dominican Republic

Caliente Resort Caribe, Dominican Republic – I love the look of this all inclusive. Caliente has a sister property in Tampa Bay that my wife and I would have seen in March if the weather had been more cooperative. The pictures of this resort make it look like paradise and a party too. This resort is only adults and offers relaxation and romance with fun too. The setting couldn’t be nicer too with beaches, hot tub, pool, etc. This place looks like it is more of a party than some of the others on my list, but when the winter winds blow, I’m ready to get out and boogie.

The Pilot House Guest House is one of many clothing optional hotels in Key West.
The Pilot House Guest House is one of many clothing optional hotels in Key West.

Pilot House Guest House, Key West – My wife and I have always loved visiting Key West. It was in fact the first place I ever saw a woman topless on a beach, but that was when I was still in elementary school on a Spring Break trip with my parents. We have been going to Key West for visits over the years and have fallen in love with the restaurants, sunset celebrations, people and the guest houses we’ve stayed at. Ironically, I only recently realized that there were clothing optional guest houses in Key West. Any of these guest houses look great, but I found many great reviews about the Pilot House Guest House. They offer a virtual tour of the pool and rooms. Location in old town Key West couldn’t be better.

Desert Sun Resort, Palm Springs – Our very first nude vacation was as the Terra Cotta Inn in Palm Springs. It was a wonderful first time for us with great people in a great setting. I would go back to the Terra Cotta Inn too except this blog is about places I haven’t been to but would like to visit soon.

What happens when you put a nude resort in the middle of downtown Palm Springs? You have the only nude resort with a bridge to cross from one side of the resort over a city street to the other side of the resort. The Desert Sun Resort is all about comfort and relaxation. It’s not small from what I’ve heard but not too big either. With a great nude pool and social experience and with the great restaurants of Palm Springs nearby, how can you go wrong?  We’d love to check it out too.  Sorry, no pictures. All pictures were copyrighted on the website and not for download.

So that’s my Naked Travel List for Winter 2015. I hope we get to one of these properties this winter. There is nothing better than a relaxing nude vacation with your spouse, especially when it’s cold and snowy at home. Have you been to any of these properties? Please share your thoughts.

Also all picture in this blog were used from each property’s website. No money was given or asked for to be included in this blog post. The list and thoughts are my own.